And then I didn't say that your criticism of me as a person was difficult, was perceptive, but bitter, or that I would like to cry, "but I don't know how to be anyone but myself," and that I felt ashamed...and then I knew that I had forgotten the affection and the courage that wrote the letter. I do not know how to be what you would rather have me be. But I will try. Of course, I will shuck off this shell; of course I will change,will grow to look around instead of inside. But in case it takes a little while, I hope that you will wave back to me from your distant shore, and understand the signal--if not the words, will see the gesture and disregard the lack of sound.